Before I start, I want you to know I’m hosting a Q&A here next week—the first after a long, long time. Got something to say or ask? Now’s your chance.
Guidelines:
1. If you’re reading this on email, reply to this Bottled Note. Otherwise, you can reach me via acelibre.news@gmail.com.
2. Deadline for submissions is Friday, 23 October 2020, at 9PM.
3. State the name you want displayed. If you wish to be anonymous, say so.
4. Any topic is fine but be polite.
I hope to hear from you.
My break from reading lasted about as long as my hiatus from Bottled Notes. The gap left me empty and dry, like a cluster of bones half-buried in desert sand.
For my first read back, I craved something restorative. Something that would again nourish my zest for life and art.
Sara Bareilles’s book Sounds Like Me had been sitting on my shelf for almost three years before I picked it up two weeks ago. I could not recall why I bought it. I know less than a handful of Bareilles’s songs: mostly just Gravity, Love Song, and Brave (yes, shame on me).
Why purchase the autobiographical work of someone whose art I was barely acquainted with?
I guess I got it because I thought the tremendous heart expressed by those songs would translate into Bareilles’s life-writing.
It was naive of me to infer the immense goodness of her soul from some of her tunes, but, as I flipped through the pages of Sounds Like Me, my intuition proved to be right.
By the time I finished reading, I was aglow with the sense that, despite the volatile state of my inner and outer worlds, I was going to be okay.
I want you to feel a version of that hope and relief, so I’m passing on bits of her wisdom.
Here are 5 life and art lessons from Sara Bareilles:
1. “There are no nets. Life is a big, long free fall, and the sooner you can embrace what is beautiful about that, the sooner you will start to enjoy the ride.”
This statement, while comforting, can be dismissed as corny when viewed through the jaded lens of 2020. It is true regardless: within our diminished existence, there is still some joy to share. Some freedom to savor. Some love to hang on to.
There is still beauty in life despite the frenzied chapter we’re all stuck in. We walk through the magnified uncertainty of these times together. Let’s keep fighting for the chance to laugh and roll with the punches.
2. “Asking for what you need with kindness is a great skill, and doesn’t mean you will always receive it, but it will certainly up your odds.”
If you have somehow convinced yourself that you are undeserving of care, attention, and compassion, I want you to know that I see you. Our mind can play tricks, fooling us into thinking we are ugly, insignificant, and therefore unworthy of love.
But I want to remind you that you are not those things, not even one bit. You matter. You are beautiful. No one can live a meaningful life without giving and receiving. We are bound to one another.
Asking for what you need invites the possibility of love. You may not always get it, but you will surprise yourself when you receive it from unexpected places.
3. “I have learned over the years that the ‘not knowing’ is part of the beauty of making music… it doesn’t have to feel precious or scary. You try things that don’t work as you hunt for what does. And sometimes you even find it.”
For those of us whose passion lies in the creative field, we know too well that dreaming up ideas and executing them can be an uphill battle. Projects fall short of our vision, and we don’t realize it until after we’ve put in an exhausting amount of work.
Failure has a knack for making us hesitate to try again, but we needn’t be daunted by missing the mark. In fact, we can trip and tumble along the way, and still win.
Instead of going in believing everything should be perfect, it benefits us to fail as often as possible in a process of elimination. The more we sift through the junk, the faster we close in on the prize.
4. “I was waiting for someone else to give me permission to make my own decisions, and that was my greatest mistake.”
Close your eyes or stare into space. Take a deep breath. In this moment of stillness, try to picture where you are in your journey. Attempt to see the areas where you might be blocking your own path, waiting for the right time to move forward.
Moving forward can mean anything: embracing a new hobby, switching careers, shifting courses, trying a different aesthetic, forming a habit, taking a shower, etc.
Reflect on why you haven’t gotten around to doing it. Is it really the right time you’re waiting for? Or are you just using that as a cover, because you know the only permission you need is from yourself, and you’re simply too afraid to give it?
5. “It’s powerful to be around someone who sees great potential where you might not.”
How we see ourselves rarely ever aligns with how others see us. The right people will tell you you can when you tell yourself I can’t, and prod you to slow down when they see you biting off more than you can chew.
The right people will offer their strength so you can overcome your weakness, and you will flourish from their honesty and generosity.
The voice inside your head isn’t always your friend. It is as fickle as the weather, and can turn on you without warning. We need to open our ears to outside voices, but we must be mindful of who we listen to. These voices can influence our views, decisions, and quality of life.
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